Smoke and Mirrors

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Here’s my dilemma.

Tomorrow Charlie has a school field trip. They are taking a bus ride somewhere to see some sort of Christmas musical. They were told they can wear holiday gear with their usual uniform. They are also capping off the festivities with a pizza party.

What this means for me.

Charlie has zero Christmas gear. I tend to do “fancy” with the boys as opposed to festive for the holiday and I don’t think they changed the uniform to include a tuxedo tee-shirt.  So I somehow need to get my butt to the dollar store. God forbid he’s the only one sans flair. This week mama already forgot to give him money for the holiday bazaar at school and “he wanted to go but the teacher told him he couldn’t go unless he had money or tickets” and I “forgot to give him money and tickets!!!”

The second complication to this event is the pizza party. Which means that I need to prepare something special for him to have in place of that delicious wedge of allergens. Albeit the pizza will be gluten free, there is still the issue of the cheese. And who wants dough with sauce on it when everyone else gets pizza. Lame! What I will make. I have no idea. I may have to throw a Hail Mary.

Factor numero three. This is forcing me to have to wake up early.

I will have to set an alarm.

Having to be up early means I have to be ready to feed these little mongrels. To address this concern I have prepared an allergy free blueberry pancake mix which is in the fridge awaiting the morning.

I have laid his clothes out.

All I have to do now is actually wake up and go through the motions. Which is about all I’m good for prior to my morning cup of coffee.

Tonight’s Mission Number 1 – Operation Holiday Flair.

Charlie’s best friend who had moved a few months back came for a visit. Charlie was not a good listener. Actually a deaf child would have been a better listener than he was. And by the time I was done with him and his brother. Who hadn’t taken a nap and was a 28 pound mass of screaming tears All. Day. Long. I threw in the towel.

“Screw his holiday crap! If I go running out to the store right now, I’m the asshole. After his behavior this month, he deserves to be the only kid without!”

A little while after the aforementioned towel throwing. I remembered that Charlie DOES have an elf hat and that it was hidden away in the basket where I keep their accessories!!! Flare would be had after all, without any additional effort from me!!!

And just like that I became the superstar mom again. Because kids don’t really see the laying out of the clothes or the prepping of breakfast the night before or the special lunch so they don’t feel left out. All they really see is the flair they either have or don’t have in relation to their peers. And how that makes them feel.

But the reality is that often it’s all smoke and mirrors and the superstar moms are really just pulling this crap out of their asses.

Sometimes I get complimented on how much I am able to do with three children and to be honest I don’t ever feel like I’m doing anything that isn’t completely necessary for the sake of my sanity. I know that there are plenty of moms out there doing things with their kids that I just do not have the intestinal fortitude for. Like craft projects.

I maintain a healthy sense of awe and respect for pretty much any mom who can get through each day all the while keeping her kids alive to see another one. And while we’re constantly being reminded not to judge others we should also remember not to judge ourselves too harshly against one another. It may just be smoke and mirrors and the always sharply dressed mom at drop off may just be a hoarder with 17 cats who can never host a play date for that reason. Not because she doesn’t want a slob like you in her house!

About The Author



I am a food allergy mama of 4 boys, a former fashion designer, and a master of the five point palm exploding heart technique, keeping it Fantastico.

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